Typical Malaysian Jokes

This is a humourous but true reflection of Malaysians.

American Spaceman is called Astronaut

Russian Spaceman is called Cosmonaut

Chinese Spaceman is called Taikonaut

Malaysian Spaceman??? - Can-or-naut

Dr. M (The Prime Minister) was thinking about sending somebody into space. Three potential can-or-nauts were called for an interview. An Indian, a Malay and a Chinese.

Dr. M interviews the Indian first: "So, Muthu, this is a dangerous mission.. How much do you think you should be paid?"

Muthu replied: "One million ringgit."

"Why so much?" asks Dr. M.

"Very dangerous mission, Datuk. Maybe no come back!" replied Muthu. "That's understandable," says Dr. M. "Thank you.. Please ask the Malay guy to come here."

So the Malay walks up, and is asked the same question.

"Alamak!...2 million, Datuk," replied the Malay candidate.

"Two million? That's twice as much! Even the aneh before you asked for only one million."

"You see, Datuk," explains the Malay, "I have 4 wives and 15 children. With 20 of us, it is a big family to support when I am gone...!"

"I see," says Dr. M. "Okay, can you ask that Chinese guy to come in then?"

The Chinese guy comes in and Dr. M asks, "Ah Chong, given this is a very risky mission, how much do you want?"

Ah Chong thinks for a while, and says, "3 million."

Mahathir appears shocked. "What! 3 million? Why so much?"

Ah Chong beckons Dr. M to come closer. He quietly whispers into his ear, "Datuk, one million you keep, one million I keep, and then one more million to send that aneh into space lah!"

One Malaysia!

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An Indian, a Chinese and a Malay were in a terrible car accident. They were all brought to the same emergency room, but all of them died. Just as they were about to put the toe tag on the Chinese, he stirred and opened his eyes.

Astonished, the doctors and nurses present, asked him what happened.

"Well," said the Chinese, "I remember the crash, and then there was a beautiful light, and then the Indian and the Malay and I were standing at the gates of heaven.

An Angel approached us and said that we were too young to die, and that for a donation of RM 500, we could return to earth. So, of course I pulled out my wallet and gave him the RM500.00 and the next thing I knew I was back here."

"That's amazing!" said one of the doctors. "But what happened to the other two?"

"Last I saw them" replied the Chinese, "the Indian was bargaining over the price, and the Malay was waiting for the government to pay for his."