What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination? "Dad, they questioned me for 3 hours, but I never told them anything !! "
What's the difference between people who pray in church and those who pray in casinos?
The ones in the casinos are serious.
When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.
A little boy went up to his father and asked: "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?" His father replied: " Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, because I still have mine."
John's teacher sent a note home to his mother, saying: "John seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about girls." The mother wrote back the next day: "If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his father!"