Hilarious Quotes

Whenever you find the key to Success, someone changes the lock.

To Err is Human, but to Forgive is not a COMPANY's policy.

The road to Success??.. Is always under construction.

Alcohol doesn't solve any Problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.

In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you have ability to Repay back.

All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or fattening.

Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear Brighter before you hear them Speak.

Everyone has a scheme of getting Rich?.. Which never works.

You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side.

Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner.

42.7% of all statistics is made on the spot.

As soon as you mention something?? If it is good, it is taken? If it is bad, it happens.

He who has the gold, makes the rules ---- Murphy's golden rule.

If you come early, the bus is late. If you come late?? The bus is still late.

Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate.

When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions.

If you have paper, you don't have a pen. If you have a pen, you don't have paper. If you have both, no one calls.

Especially for Engineering Students: If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance.

You will pick up maximum wrong numbers when on roaming.

The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom.

After a long wait for bus no. 20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be crowded than the other.

Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker.

There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and the right side.

An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.

Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.

When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

Well done is better than well said .

Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when nobody is looking.

Where there is a WILL, there is a WAY, Where there is MONEY, there are many WAYS.

Where there is MONEY, there are many FRIENDS and RELATIVES.

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.