Thursday, August 20, 2009

Funny Cow Stories

TRADITIONAL CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one and bought a baby bull.
Nurse and feed it well.
They mate, your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You invest & keep the gains into the country reserve.
You sell them and everyone retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You mortgage both of them to the bank & obtain investment for two more cows,
Then re-mortgage the four cows for eight cows and continue to do likewise.
The financial market was flooding with mortgages & investments in cow's assets.
No one knows where & who owned the original 2 cows?
Then these 2 original cows grew old & eventually died.
You are surprised when there's No Asset to back up the mortgage or repay the loan?
Finally, You ask the government to bail out the collapsed financial cow’s market!

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow andproduce twenty times the milk.
You then create clever cow cartoon images called 'Cowkimon' and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You break for lunch.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5,000 cows and none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment and high bovine productivity.
You have the newsman who reported on the numbers arrested.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A MALAYSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You signed a 40-year contract to supply milk at RM0.06 per litre.
Then midway through, you raised the price to RM0.60 or you cut the supply.
When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change your mind again and now want RM1.20.
The buyer decided you can keep the milk and they go look for milk that comes from recycled cows or the cow urine instead.
Your two cows retire together with the Prime Minister.

And last but not least,

A TAIWANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows,
One "cow-peh" and one "cow-bu".
(Hokkien, meaning making a din.)

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